Sleep Deprivation Finale: The Amby Bed Placebo (Or the Only Person Who Thinks it Sucks.)

I put Abby down for a nap in the Amby bed right away. It was in the corner of our sunken living room which had now become my bedroom. With pride and a bit of gloating I noted to my husband Mark how she slept in it through dinner and another few hours.

"I told you it would work."

"I'll agree to that when you wake me tomorrow morning at 8am because she slept through the night, like the website insinuates." I ignored his pessimistic comments and started my night shift with glee. Abby would sleep better I was positive.

Abby slept the same as she did in the cradle. In fact as the days wore on, Abby slept better in the cradle than the Amby bed. The first annoyance was that Abby liked to be swaddled. We also believed by now that Abby had reflux and needed the head of the hammock raised. So, according to the website directions (because the ones that came with the bed did not tell me how to adjust it) I raised one end of the hammock. Being swaddled with one end raised, Abby began to slide down toward the foot of the bed and into the swaddling. This was NOT a good thing.

So she had to sleep unswaddled, which meant that her arms were free to flail about. The premise of the Amby bed is that when the baby moves or thrashes, the bed moves and therefore it will lull the child back to sleep. This may work if a 15lb moosling were sleeping in the bed, but not Abby. So my nights began to follow a pattern of: feed Abby, burp Abby, and jiggle the Amby bed up and down until Abby drifts off. When Abby wakes again in 5 minutes, roll over and jiggle the bed. The cradle on the other hand, ran on batteries and jiggled itself.

I kept trying to get it to work. I blamed the new medications for her reflux, Zantac and Reglan. I blamed the formula until we put her on lactose free. I did everything I could to make the Amby bed live up to the glowing letters from parents around the world who spoke of their children sleeping the night away from day one. (Heck even from week one!) I didn't expect a baby of 5 weeks to sleep through the night. But I did expect at least a 4 hour stretch? Maybe 5 if I was really really good, and the Powers that Be decided to give me a break?

Mark on the other hand after a week, would come down every morning and promptly remove Abby from the hammock and put her in her cradle. When he took the night shift, he swaddled her and plunked her in the cradle. He refused to use the Amby bed. It was a fad, he told me. Parents deprived on sleep who had the cash would be willing to do ANYTHING to get some shut-eye, he remarked. I didn't give voice to my doubts, but I was beginning to believe him. I had been keeping notes since Abby came home from the hospital about her sleeping patterns and there was no difference.

So the next night I swaddled her and put her in the cradle. Then I spent nights switching her back and forth first in the Amby then in the cradle. Then we tried to bring the Amby bed upstairs alongside our bed. That lasted one night. (She makes too many grunting noises for her to be in the same room with us.) Next, we put her in the Amby in the nursery with her 15 month old brother. (Who slept in his crib.)

Then it happened. I awoke at 4am one morning confused that Mark had not jostled me for a 1am feeding. He brought Abby into the room and told me how he had put her in her crib. Her huge white crib that had sat empty since she came home. In her crib flat on her tummy, with a binky, and she slept for 3 hours straight. I conceded. The Amby bed was not a miracle. It was a glorified laundry bag on a banana hanger.

The laundry bag now sits in our bedroom off to the side for the occasional nap time when I cannot risk waking Aidan. Then Abby will be put down in the Amby bed where she sometimes naps for 3 hours. However she can nap for 3 hours in the car seat, in her bouncy seat, and in her crib. (The combination of which did not cost as much as the Amby bed.)

There is no doubt the Amby bed works for other people. Maybe they were lucky. Maybe it only works if you truly believe with all your heart and have no other choices (like an electronic cradle.) Maybe the miracle of the Amby bed is something akin to the placebo effect. However, for us it was a $250 placebo that never worked miracles.

Now that Abby spends her nights in her crib, sleeping sometimes in 5 hour stretches, I find myself faced with what I am sure other parents have dealt with. (But for some reason don't talk about it.) Admitting failure and selling on eBay. Because, as Mark mentioned, why are there so many Amby beds available on eBay?

I still hold on to it for one reason, okay maybe two. One, she does nap in it when I can't put her in the nursery and two, I would have to admit my husband was right.